You’ve decided you want to start therapy, Now what?

So, you’ve done it. You’ve decided to put yourself out there, and seek the help you need. Maybe you’ve been struggling with depression or anxiety. Maybe you just need an outside perspective. Maybe you’re having issues in a relationship. But you’re ready to get that help, so you find a therapist who is taking clients. Finding a therapist who you like and fits with who you are can be kind of like shopping: you have to find what is best for you and the stage you are in.

Here are some tips to help you on your search:

1. What kind of therapy do you do? When a therapist answers, it can give you a little more insight into what therapy with that person might look like.

2. Are you comfortable working with __? It’s okay to ask if there’s something they specialize in or work with. Therapists genuinely want you to get the help that you need.

3. Do you have any referrals? Are there other therapists you would recommend that do work with my issue/population/demographic? Asking if they have any recommendations or referrals is more than okay. A therapist isn’t going to be offended that you don’t want to work with them because they won’t supply what you need.

4. Have you ever had therapy? Therapists need therapy just as much as anyone else, and so it’s very important to know if your therapist has put in the work that’s needed on themselves emotionally to work with others on a deep level. You can’t pour from an empty cup, even as a trained therapist.

5. What is your degree/qualification? These days, there are a lot of people claiming to do the work of a therapist, when in reality they don’t have the degrees to go along with it. A therapist should have a Master’s degree at minimum (or be working towards one and currently in their internship). “Life coaches” are often not therapists. Some may be beneficial, but they will not be able to treat mental health the same way a licensed clinician can.

6. What are your expectations of me (homework, attending sessions, how often meeting, etc.)? Therapists are there to help guide you along the path of recovery. They can offer suggestions, help you change your frame of thinking, or certain behaviors, but they can’t “fix” you. Some therapists assign “homework” for their clients to do. Some therapists ask a client to do one method of self-care after therapy. Know that most therapists suggest practicing things learned in therapy once you’ve left the therapy space.

7. Do you take my insurance? What are your fees? Some therapists take insurance, and some don’t. It’s important to be proactive in terms of knowing what could be covered for you. And, if that therapist doesn’t accept your insurance (or you’re not sure if there’s a copay, etc.!), expect that payment is necessary.

Source: https://www.ourmentalhealth.info/post/questions-for-the-therapist

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Episode 12

“Daydreams or Betrayal: The Role of Sexual Fantasies in Fidelity”

🎧 In This Episode:

- Dispel guilt and shame around sexual fantasies in monogamous relationships.

- Understand the difference between fantasizing and desiring.

- Recognize when fantasies may be problematic and the therapeutic power of talking about them.

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